Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Top Ten Reasons To Hate Bono



I really really Bono.

TOP TEN REASON TO HATE BONO

1. He 'sings' in U2
U2 are the anti-music. Not even Simon Cowell himself could concoct a group so vile and lacking in soul. Black Lace, Fast Food Rockers, the makers of the Crazy Frog and Westlife all sleep easy at night safe in the knowledge that their musical crimes wer einsignificant next to those of U2. U2 are absolute masters of the non-song. Okay, some time in the 80s they actually wrote 1 or 2 passable songs but since then they've churned out on-songs. By non-songs I mean those vague middle of the road bits of innoffensive fluf that don't have any real choruses or verses. They just 'exist'. There's no atual tune. The ultimate in blandness.

2. Sunglasses
Does he wear them to hide the lizard eyes? David Icke told me he does and I'm inclined to believe him.

3. His charity work
Is there anything worse in the world than multi millionaires telling everyone how bad global poverty is. Completely vomit inducing.

4. He sings in U2
Just thought I'd remind you!

5. I hate Bono
I hate Bono therefore you should too!

6. Just look at him
Isn't he so smug. Don't you just want to shoot him in the face.

7. He called himself Bono
What hell kind of stupid nickname is 'Bono'?

8. He sings in U2
I can't emphasise this enough

9. He is still alive
Why hasn't someone shot him in the face yet?

10. He sings in U2
Just thought I'd drive this point in once again.


36 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

11) He's in a band with someone called The Edge

12) The Sweetest Thing

13) Him and Geldoff at 7:1 to pick up Nobel peace prize

roll on July 1st

4:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love U2 they changed my life. You are stupid and mean, you should try and be positive.

I hate you

3:38 AM  
Anonymous David said...

hey, anonymous. I love you.

U2 is the biggest band in terms of progression since The Beatles. Because Bono is wealthy and against global poverty means he can actually donate money and forward the cause. Is there anything wrong with saving starving children? Does it really matter where the money came from? And another little tidbit for you: President of South Africa Thabo Mbeki was CONVINCED by a panel of scientists that AIDS did not even exist. Bono SINGLEHANDEDLY changed his mind and has worked for an increase in the importation of medication. He has also spent time talking to virtually every powerful leader of the western world, including George W. Bush. SO, perhaps you should examine what YOU'VE done to help this world, and THEN judge Bono on superficial things, condemning him because he likes himself or because he wears silly glasses. It's great to know that we have such well-informed, intellectually advanced people to decide who deserves to die based on Andrew or Paul's nickname.

12:26 AM  
Blogger . said...

I would help the world by eliminating Bono. This blogger is my god.

http://www.eliminatebono.com

10:30 AM  
Anonymous Chris said...

Hey man...i absolutely love U2 but this made me laugh...excellent...i love this kind of humor :-D

4:30 AM  
Anonymous Zoostorm said...

this is so amazingly silly, it almost made me laugh...almost

next player, shoot again

4:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi-hi-hi !

C'est tellement mauvais que, même en étant un grand fan de U2, je ne suis même pas échaudé par la daube que viens de nous pondre !
Juste un truc : sur 10 raisons ya quand même 3 fois la même. Bravo l'imagination :-p

Allez, au moins tu auras pu améliorer ton français en lisant ce commentaire !

vatvig

7:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Euh que dis-je 3, c'est 4 fois le même commentaire. Chapeau-bas l'artiste !

:-))

7:40 AM  
Anonymous Hewson Paul said...

Ten reason to not read this page

1.He sings in U2: the best rock band

2. sunglasses: great!!!

3.his charity work: what can we say????

4. He sings in U2: the most original rock band!

5.i love bono

6. just look at him: he looks very pretty

7. he called himself bono: such a good nickname!!!

8.he sings in U2: i love U2

9. He's still alive and he feels good!

10. i'll love U2 forever!!!

As you can see i have the same worst arguments than you, i hope you mean what i said and do you know what we reply to a comportement like your: "j't'emmerde gros con"

8:02 AM  
Anonymous A person who is obviously more educated in music, politics and fighting than you said...

You sound really educated. Seriously.

BTW:

Here are some tips for arguing

1. Try not to use the same arguement over and over again "HE SINGS IN U2" Once you've made a statement, move on to the next one.

2.Try to sound like you actually know what you are talking and arguing about.

3. Provide accurate information

4. Don't provide opinions, provide facts.

5. If you can't provide either, don't bother arguing because someone who can provide those will outwit you

6. If you don't like U2, thats fine. But you don't need to try and persuade others, because they will either blow you off, beat you up, or try and fight with you.

7. He won a Nobel Peace Prize because of the ways he IMPROVED and HELPED our world. And face it America is corrupt, and the rest of the world needs everyone's help to get back on the right track and to provide equality.

8. He won Grammys, Music Awards, and all those other awards because people LIKE his music, and they believe he deserves the award.

9. Rolling Stone, American Billboard, and the people who live on this planet made them the biggest band in the world, and that's not an opinion. That's a fact.

10. Yes he wears sunglasses. We are aware of that. It's no different from someone like Billy Joe from Green Day always wearing a tie, Rappers from wearing all those necklaces and "grills", and Prince from wearing purple.


GROW UP

10:58 AM  
Anonymous FOAD bet you can't figure out what that means said...

Ok, tell me. What have YOU done lately to help anyone?


Multimillionares give off their money to charity because they don't NEED it. Now tell me. What would you do if you had several millions of dollars? Would you try to help? I doubt it.


You almost fooled me. Almost.

You're going to have to try a little harder, because you do not sound smart at all.

11:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It looks like you are outnumbered by U2 fans.


Hmm...interesting. Now what does this tell you?

11:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have been a fan of U2 and Bono for about 27 years now and all i can think when i read this shit is that these people have no clue and it is just a shame that they have anything to do with this thing called LIFE. Life should be about positive thinking and positive actions. I constantly surround myself with positive things in my life, it is a shame that you cant do the same. I half heartedly feel sorry for you and anybody that you cross paths with in your PATHETIC little lives.
HAVE A NICE DAY!!

1:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

U2 fans are stupid. The author of misanthropy blog is your god and master. Bono will be shot in the face. Or Shit on the face, that might be even better. Bono is weak. I am the BEST!

8:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bono never won a nobel peace prize. He was nominated (with that cunt geldof) but never won.

Thank Fuck.

3:49 PM  
Anonymous ABF said...

Forgot : it's a dwarf // (and don't worry next summer friends and I will shoot on his shitty face ... yeah //)

12:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've been a U2 fan for many years, but I have to admit I can't even read transcripts of interviews with Bono without skipping over stuff. The guy doesn't know when to stop talking. Which may be part of the reason he counts like he does (1,2, 3, 14! Ha, ha , ha, omg)just running his mouth.
Might just buy that t-shirt...great site

11:55 AM  
Anonymous Eric Blair said...

U2 are a fairly dull rock band, who are not at all radical in their politics, style or music They are popular in America because Americans like things that are seemingly radical, but in the end are reassuring and bland. U2 is the Bill Clinton of rock .

As for Bono: he is consumed with self regard and moral vanity. Have you noticed how careful he is to never make a tough call or take a divisive stand. Any political cause he takes up can easily be whittled down to a trite moral slogan such as "racism is bad" or "give Africans more money." It is all so shallow and simplistic. Sloganeering for the simple minded.

7:18 AM  
Anonymous Eric Blair said...

U2 are a fairly dull rock band, who are not at all radical in their politics, style or music They are popular in America because Americans like things that are seemingly radical, but in the end are reassuring and bland. U2 is the Bill Clinton of rock .

As for Bono: he is consumed with self regard and moral vanity. Have you noticed how careful he is to never make a tough call or take a divisive stand. Any political cause he takes up can easily be whittled down to a trite moral slogan such as "racism is bad" or "give Africans more money." It is all so shallow and simplistic. Sloganeering for the simple minded.

7:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bono has singlehandedly done FUCK ALL but encourage, not get commitments to, ending poverty by forgiving third world debt..keeping in mind that the reasons these countries are in debt is their corrupt, military dictatorships that run their countries like slave owners, living like kings with machine guns while the people starve. Forgiving that debt will nothing for the starving people, because these evil motherfuckers in power over there will just have that much more for themselves. Maybe Bono can use THAT to sell his next album or get his face on the news, the ignorant cunt.

12:44 PM  
Anonymous Tony Blair said...

I say, look here, you lot, Gordon and I think your man is pretty all right. He addressed our conference, gave George an 'Ipod' - whatever that is (I trust it wasn't something to thrust up his bottom)- and he is about to finish off saving Africa. His brother Bob has done most of the spadework, that's why we knighted him. (He generously waived aside all that tripe about Irish republicanism for the occasion). I'm telling you now, so you had better get used to the idea.
Bono is scheduled to be a peer in our H.O.L before too long. Can't you just see him in his robes..? little, lank-haired, fancy-spectacled to avoid having to look anybody straight in the eye (Only jesting), mean mouthed (Again, only jesting), in black - a colour I am told he has take a patent out on - and that eloquence!
Don't tell me Laurence Olivier had the best voice ever. Not even Valentine Dyall, Jeremy Irons or Michael Gambon could or can articulate like Bono. I only wish we had him full time. I'd make him Chancellor, Foreign and Home Secretary and anything else he wanted to be. I've fallen out with that little tyke from Oasis so he won't even get knighted now. If I hear of any of you saying anything untoward about my buddy Bono, I'll loose Mr Reid on them. Cheers, everyone.

1:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

1. Try not to use the same arguement over and over again "HE SINGS IN U2" Once you've made a statement, move on to the next one. obviously we need subtitles for thew humor impaired. repetition is a method of accentuating a point, and is thus funny. look into it. see :"running gags"

2.Try to sound like you actually know what you are talking and arguing about.
he does. Bono sucks
3. Provide accurate information
blah blah blah
4. Don't provide opinions, provide facts.blah blah blah

5. If you can't provide either, don't bother arguing because someone who can provide those will outwit youblah blah blah

6. If you don't like U2, thats fine. But you don't need to try and persuade others, because they will either blow you off, beat you up, or try and fight with you.That shows the mentality of U2 fans

7. He won a Nobel Peace Prize because of the ways he IMPROVED and HELPED our world. And face it America is corrupt, and the rest of the world needs everyone's help to get back on the right track and to provide equality.He didn't win it, he was nominated, and didn't deserve THAT because he is a corporate millionaire record company whore who cares less about the starving africans as he does about selling records and padding his own pockets

8. He won Grammys, Music Awards, and all those other awards because people LIKE his music, and they believe he deserves the award.lovers of pop music have no taste. Pop=shit, and being proud of liking shitty music is, well, nothing to be proud of. Baaaaaa, sheep, baaaaaa

9. Rolling Stone, American Billboard, and the people who live on this planet made them the biggest band in the world, and that's not an opinion. That's a fact.See Corporate Whores, and Pop Music. Baaaa

10. Yes he wears sunglasses. We are aware of that. It's no different from someone like Billy Joe from Green Day always wearing a tie, Rappers from wearing all those necklaces and "grills", and Prince from wearing purple.
Good lord in heaven, it took you 10 tries but you finally said something that isn't fucking stupid. You're right, they all deserve to be shot in the face too, but mostly because idiot fans and defenders of their shit buy all this style fucking crap that gets pushed down your throats on TV. It is all ridiculous, corpotae marketing shit, and you should all kill yourselves for buying into it.
Thank you, and have a smashing day. I hope you all fuck off and die.


GROW UP

2:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You mean you need more than one reason to hate Bono? He's a smug, self-important prick who can't sing worth a damn but still believes his own hype. What? That's not enough reason all by itself?

And to all you fawning, obsequious little fanboy sissies who couldn't resist rushing to the defense of your Big Hero, Bono...grow a brain, get a life, and stop worshiping that empty, soulless shadow of a man.

8:14 PM  
Blogger Ashley Rocker Bitch said...

I COMPLETELY DISAGREE WITH YOU! What's so wrong with wearing sunglasses all the time. Sounds cool to me. Bono does charity work, why, what about YOU? Did you ever donate money, or event ry helping the world????? Look at yourself first before you judge others. AND AS A HUGE U2 FAN...HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There's not many more rabid than U2 fans.

I especially like, "you are stupid and mean, be more positive" and then "I hate you".

Absolutely fantastic stuff! Still laughing!

12:42 AM  
Anonymous ihatebono said...

Hahaha!

I hate Bono too. That's why I made www.ihatebono.com.

I hate him. HATE HIM!!! AAAARGHHGA!!

Sorry, he does that to me sometimes.

8:25 PM  
Anonymous Feeding the Troll said...

Because I'm bored enough to respond:

1. You have every right to dislike U2, other singers are out there that sound worse than fingernails on a chalkboard. I'd rather rant about them than a singer I find boring, which was part of your arguement.

2. He wears them for an eye allergy that makes him sensitive to light and causes severe red eye. I have a similar eye disorder and sometimes wish I had the cash for that many pairs of perscription sunglasses.

3. Bono work has reduced the debt of various poverty stricken nations by millions of dollars, provided much needed retroviral drugs to people that can't afford them, and created jobs at fair wages. Not only that he's actually spent time with his wife volunteering in schools and clinics in Africa. What have you done to make the world a better place?

4. Learn to actually make a top 10 list without repeating...be original

5. I'm not really concerned with what you do and don't like. I just managed to click here out of boredom.

6. Could we look at you to judge you based on your appearence please?

7. Bono was a nickname given to him by his friends that are still his friends to this day. I wish I had more friends that I was that close to. Your pettiness makes me wonder if you have friends at all.

8. Seriously, do you have a short term memory problem?

9. Does he sit there poking you with a stick day in and day out in order to make you want him dead? Perhaps you want to have this chip on your shoulder looked at.

10. So really you have a top 7 reasons since you can't fill out the other 3 places with an original thought. Yay for you and your superior self. I suggest taking all this hate you have for an entertainer and all the other things that make you misanthropic and put them to something useful. Work to make the world a place you can be happy to be in.

7:37 AM  
Anonymous Bonohood said...

Don't know if your post is a result of gratuitous hatred and/or if you're crazy enough to actually shoot Bono. All I know is that one David Chapman in this world is enough.

Your blog should be shut down and you should be tracked and prosecuted!

1:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If any of my friends nicknamed me Bono I would shoot them in the face.

6:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Guy
You have got to see this. Obama playing on XBox. Funniest video ever. http://bit.ly/bllhx1

12:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's a fucking cunt

8:21 AM  
Blogger stax said...

I keep seeing diamonds in his eyes in visions.

a christian

1:27 PM  
Blogger stax said...

bono (paul) also said on tv that he has done some pretty evil stuff, and that you shouldn't criticize other religions.

1:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love every intellectual garbage thrown at bono. This list is as good as it gets, and I too must admit, the the blogger now is my god. I would, more than anything in the world, cut his head off with a tea spoon and bury him with a nuclear powered, red ipod, stuffed with the edge's guitar solos.

6:45 AM  
Blogger KJ said...

"Most original band since the Beatles."

WHAT?? What's original about U2? They suck and have like 2 good songs that are about 20 years old. What have they done since? Vertigo? How about Verti-no! Bono is a self-centered d!ck. Some people see it and some don't, but he is. U2 has no soul so they surround themselves with spectacle and pomp but no "meat." They hide behind charity to keep themselves relevant. Oh, and as a bass player I can tell you their bass player sucks. I can play his songs better than him. But I choose not to because their songs suck! I'd rather play Lady Gaga than U2 covers.

8:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well when i saw one of my friends post this on my wall, i thought ... this is going to be funny, sure there are U2 haters out there (understandable for people under the age of 30 who don't know much about the band), and then i read this post. Dude you have no idea about U2 and the world, Bono, their hits, their great albums, their failures and their come backs, the good they have done in the world. And ... you complete with poor grammar and can't spell, well done!

3:47 PM  

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